Sometimes i wonder...would i truly be happy if i moved to New York? OR is it simply just because of guys. Will i feel happy walking down the street filled with tall buildings. i will most likely be alone. i have always been alone and it isn't foreign to me anymore. i do a lot of things alone go to work, shop, eat, watch movies just about everything. why will chaning my atmosphere change that for me. sure i know several people in new york now. great people some of them. or very few of them. Will moving to a huge city make me happy being surronded by so many people? will it will it. i wonder if it will. i always dreamed of moving to New York. I dreamed about being in New York with you. holding hands walking down the street at 2am it was dark. all i remember was your smile your laugh the way you held me close. i remembering being so happy in my dream. it was true happiness that i never felt. than i woke up. shock wave of intense pain ran through me. it was all a dream. a dream that won't ever come true. how i wish for once my dream can come true. i don't care for money clothes jewelry flowers i don't care about that i just want to be happy. i want to feel loved. maybe new york. maybe you are my happiness.Monday, May 14, 2012
New York Dreams
Sometimes i wonder...would i truly be happy if i moved to New York? OR is it simply just because of guys. Will i feel happy walking down the street filled with tall buildings. i will most likely be alone. i have always been alone and it isn't foreign to me anymore. i do a lot of things alone go to work, shop, eat, watch movies just about everything. why will chaning my atmosphere change that for me. sure i know several people in new york now. great people some of them. or very few of them. Will moving to a huge city make me happy being surronded by so many people? will it will it. i wonder if it will. i always dreamed of moving to New York. I dreamed about being in New York with you. holding hands walking down the street at 2am it was dark. all i remember was your smile your laugh the way you held me close. i remembering being so happy in my dream. it was true happiness that i never felt. than i woke up. shock wave of intense pain ran through me. it was all a dream. a dream that won't ever come true. how i wish for once my dream can come true. i don't care for money clothes jewelry flowers i don't care about that i just want to be happy. i want to feel loved. maybe new york. maybe you are my happiness.
Wednesday, May 9, 2012
Rain.
It's raining outside.
I like the sound of the cars passing by and that swish swish sound you hear.
the sound of the rain hitting the window.
it's soothing in a way.
i have this thing for umbrellas. in love with them obsessed actually.
i had this dream once of you holding an umbrella and walking towards me.
it was pouring outside and you held that umbrella over me
you held me closed and told me let's go home.
that feeling of someone protecting me being there for me.
that's how my obsession started i guess.
when i think of umbrellas i think of protection.
I like the sound of the cars passing by and that swish swish sound you hear.
the sound of the rain hitting the window.
it's soothing in a way.
i have this thing for umbrellas. in love with them obsessed actually.
i had this dream once of you holding an umbrella and walking towards me.
it was pouring outside and you held that umbrella over me
you held me closed and told me let's go home.
that feeling of someone protecting me being there for me.
that's how my obsession started i guess.
when i think of umbrellas i think of protection.
Tuesday, May 8, 2012
what's the point?
sometimes i wonder...
what is the point of trying or doing anything
why bother with people that don't give a shit about you
you try and try
keep texting them they ignore you
they stop calling you
they quickly disappear
but once you were everything to them
once you felt like you were so special to them
it was a amazing feeling
the high i felt from simply feeling wanted was great
that's all i want is to feel wanted
what's the point anymore to try with someone new again
it will just end how it always does
what is the point of trying or doing anything
why bother with people that don't give a shit about you
you try and try
keep texting them they ignore you
they stop calling you
they quickly disappear
but once you were everything to them
once you felt like you were so special to them
it was a amazing feeling
the high i felt from simply feeling wanted was great
that's all i want is to feel wanted
what's the point anymore to try with someone new again
it will just end how it always does
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